random words jotted when the urge strikes

in preparation for a baby i need. . . ?

2008-02-21T11:10:00.002-06:00

bottles: Playtex Drop-ins. They do no contain BPA(a harmful chemical in other plastics)
3 8oz bottles
3 4oz bottles
3 extra nipples
Tons of liners

Pacifiers: need all 3 kinds, because it promotes sucking in newborns, ut each kid has certain ons they like.

Diapers: Pampers newborn swaddlers and then pampers cruzers

Burp Cloths: gerber cloth diapers, need a lot of these

Bibs: expect to go through 5-6 a day, buy the cheapy cotton ones that come 10 to a pack

Crib Sheets: need two sets if you are expecting to do laundry every other day, which you probably will need to.

*Get a sheet Saver, which is a thick pad that straps to the sides of a crib and can help catch spit up so you don't have to change the sheets everyday.

Play-pen: a portable one is ideal so you can move around the house with you.

Bouncer or swing: try to get the model that does both, even though it is extra because sometimes they like one and sometimes the other depending on their mood.

Swaddlers: help keep fussy newborns calmer.

Soft washclothes for the bath

Baby bath Tub: fisher price has a good one that supports really well.

Diaper cream: The BEST one is Triple Paste.

Tools: baby nail clipper, nasal aspirator, thermometer

Mattress pad liner for the crib

Wipes: always get unscented

**If you have a a water softner, you'll need to buy nursery water for the formula***

Lots of blankets - nothing fancy since they will end up with poop, pee, spit up and snot on them.

Monitor: The video one by Summer works well.

Dreft detergent

lots of onesies

socks with beading on the cuffs - these are the only ones that stay on.

2-3 Hats

Circumcision Supplies: 4x4 gauze cut in half, vasoline

Belly button Care: Alcohol swabs

bath supplies: no lavender scented ANYTHING.

Never use baby powder because it gets in the babies lungs.

the tree

2007-12-18T08:26:00.000-06:00

33

2007-11-30T08:47:00.000-06:00

a few weeks back i turned thirty-three. no big deal, really (except it's the hobbit coming-of-age). however, these past several weeks i've felt older and older. you know, baggy skin, circles under eyes, creaking joints. . . hopefully i'll overcome this new oldness, or at least learn to accept it.

i don't know what it is. . .

2007-08-03T10:41:00.000-05:00

but his lyrics always get stuck in my head:

The mind has so many pictures
Why can't I sleep with my eyes open?
The mind has so many memories
Can you remember what it looks like when I cry?

spirit of racine

2007-07-24T11:08:00.000-05:00

half i.m. time (my best yet, but my run should've been much better! here's to next year. . .)

swim: 35:27
trans1: 2:48
bike: 2:32:01 (22.1 mph)
trans2: 2:58
run: 2:09:11 (9:52 pace)

total: 5:22:25 (464/1256)

down with "conventional wisdom"! (or another annoying rant)

2007-04-27T16:47:00.000-05:00

. . . so, yesterday in the whirlpool at the gym, some guy mentions that he's participating in the "jewish triathlon," that is -- steam, whirlpool, shower. at first i thought he said "douche's triathlon," to which i chuckled politely. (i don't know why, but maybe it had to do with the fact that we were both naked.)

but. he then clarifies by saying: it's okay, his jewish friend told him that. "oh," i think "jewish triathlon. is that funny?"

the more i thought about it, the more the comment bothered me. first off, why does it make it okay to spout off some thinly-veiled racist remark just because some idiot friend of yours said it? second, what does that even mean? (jews enjoy bathing more than others, or that they're lazier, or that they can't do sports?? i'm confused.) third, how did the guy know i wasn't jewish myself? was he trying to mark his territory, assert his anglo-saxon god-given authority all over my semitic ass?

now, i'm less bothered by the "un-p.c." nature of this comment, than the sheer fundamental premise of jokes like this. . . they tend to support a culture that never questions "conventional wisdom." i myself am a fan of never accepting an idea simply because every other idiot thinks it's true. (look at saddam and the weapons of mass destruction in the lead-up to the current war or the unexplainable best-seller that was the da vinci code.) everytime that joke is told, whatever stereotypes are behind it become further entrenched in our collective psyche. ick.

my points (if there are any): things can be funny or true without attributing entire behavioral characteristics onto an entire group of people. . . also, truth has very little to do, in most circumstances, with over-generalizations. think for yourself, and don't accept "givens" as true without question. as our country is all too aware these days, that kind of failure of thought can get us in a lot of trouble.

ah, springtime in chicago. . .

2007-04-11T12:28:00.000-05:00

(from the chicago tribune)

(almost) at a loss for words

2007-03-26T09:09:00.000-05:00

after scouring (read quickly searching) the internet for a substantive review of the "movie" 300, which we saw this past saturday, my desires were left wanting somewhat. so, here i am writing down my thoughts as some sort of catharsis. why would i bother to write a review of 300 of all movies? because i'm bothered, that's why. it's been the top box office draw for three straight weekends, including breaking the record for any first weekend box office draw ever. so, i think it's a movie that's probably worth some attention.

i'll admit that i was confused when i first heard the premise of the movie: a historically-based account of a battle between the Persian armies of King Xerxes and a gathering of 300 or so Spartan soldiers in about 480 b.c.

as a somewhat modern guy with a somewhat basic understanding of western culture, i was concerned. who's point of view will this movie adopt? surely not the Persian view, but surely not the Spartan view, either.

after all, weren't we all taught that the Spartans were the enemy in the classic battle of freedom versus what can only be described as military fascism? wasn't it the Athenian culture that was the defender of the standard for what we value as all that's good and right in the world: free thought, discourse, love of mankind, humanism, art, industry, science, mathematics, philosophy, et cetera?

wasn't Sparta the horrible place where the weak were killed in the name of a "perfect race," and where all other human function was suppressed in the name of war? isn't that where we get the word spartan in today's usage?

and, between these two cultures, Athens and Sparta, wasn't it Athens who was the ultimate victor, showing a strength of will and industry that Sparta could never dream of? isn't it the culture and productivity of Athens that the Romans and eventually the enlightenment and eventually the entire western world's culture were based upon?

well, be that as it may, the entire movie was told from the spartan perspective! weird. and this weirdness was obvious from the first scene of the movie, where we see the future King of the Spartans, Leonidas, being held over a pit of tiny sculls, being inspected to see if he has any defects. obviously, if this baby has any visible defect, it's to be tossed into the baby pit -- no room for the weak and deformed in Sparta!

and we're supposed to identify with this society, somehow find it compelling and worthy? root for it against the Persians?? already, this movie is making me a bit angry. and it just gets worse. it's not just the obvious racism, sexism, homophobia, and excessive gore that turned me off, but the seemingly underlying and terrifying message: that, despite what the Spartan law says, King Leonidas is the hero because he takes the law into his own hands and goes off to war to be strong. to be a man! oo-rah!

this message stood out as an obvious comment on what's going on today in our country. a false and misleading comment, however. i can just see a bunch of frustrated overgrown bully-types reveling in the message of this movie: thought and law and restraint and caution are bad for justice and freedom: only the strong survive! otss! otss! "this is just like Iraq," they'd proclaim: "Bush is just like Leonidas!" "despite the girly-man wishes of the Congress and the American people and the overwhelming truth, Bush was strong and took us to Iraq to defend against the hordes! "

the thought of this type of discourse maddens me for so many reasons. . . first off, in the movie, Sparta was being invaded! secondly, the rash actions of the King may have killed off a few thousand Persians, but it is ultimately the deliberations of the Spartan Council and the help from Athens that historically caused the Greek win over the Persians. thirdly, it was Xerxes who was attempting world military domination, not the Spartans. so, in the current military quagmire, who is the U.S. more like, the Spartans or the Persian armies? the answer is obvious.

so, before all you red-blooded, gun-totin', meat-eatin', thought-bashin' idiots feel all justified and hopped-up by this homo-erotic fantasy of a movie, think about what it's really saying, and think whether any of our society's values, (yes, even the christian ones), are being followed or exalted. . . just think about it a bit.

from the "no duh" files

2007-03-21T10:28:00.000-05:00

to disprove all of you who don't think that fox news has a right-wing "slant" (more like a full-tilt):

"Democratic pollster Mark Mellman, via Taegan Goddard's Political Wire: 'An audience that decides for itself, based on 'fair and balanced' coverage, ought not to reach monolithic conclusions. Yet, in our 2004 polling with Media Vote, using Nielsen diaries, we found that Fox News viewers supported George Bush over John Kerry by 88 percent to 7 percent. No demographic segment, other than Republicans, was as united in supporting Bush. Conservatives, white evangelical Christians, gun owners, and supporters of the Iraq war all gave Bush fewer votes than did regular Fox News viewers.'"

(from salon.com)

someone asked the question: here's my answer

2007-02-28T16:23:00.000-06:00

love is living for another
love is
joy
desire
trust
honor
warmth
silence
noise
struggle
resolution
sacrifice. sacrifice without thought. willing sacrifice knowing that what you're about to do will hurt, knowing that you won't ever be the same after, knowing that the other person can't ever even begin to comprehend how much you sacrificed. but you don't even care. you don't even want him to know your sacrifice. you hope he never finds out how much you would do to save him or help him in the least, and still want nothing in return. you want nothing in return but you get it anyway.

love is comfort in another
love is
eating
cooking
sleeping
cleaning
paying the bills
driving to the vet
bringing him an advil at 2:30 in the morning from downstairs
cleaning out a wound without flinching
covering a bill in a tight spot
lugging 8 2-liter bottles of regular coke up three flights of stairs
(but you don't drink regular coke, only he does)
watering his 3000 plants when he's away
(twice a day)
doing anything at the mere hint of desire
(but sometimes giving him well-deserved attitude and then doing it anyway)
knowledge. knowledge of what he wants, his basic modus operandi, his past and his future, his love of cuisine and music and reading and history and politics and bbc mini-series and satire and art and everything that makes life rise above the toil. knowledge that he knows the same about you, and will work to make sure you get everything you want.

love is a pain in the ass
love is
work
daily drudgery
endless car-rides
annoying relatives
boring relatives
waits in the dentist office lounge
a bad night of gas
a bad morning for bad breath
that pimple on the back that just won't go away
routine. routine of acceptance, of habit, of knowing there will always be the bad things, but that a shared bad thing is always better than experiencing the bad thing alone. that you secretly enjoy the imperfections, love them in and of themselves as a reminder that you yourself are human and mortal, and that you can't love perfection, because it isn't human or mortal, or real. love is love of something real.

love is desire
love is
rapture
passion
burning
longing
salivating like a dog at dinner time
abandon
(even reckless abandon)
losing yourself in his limbs
begging for mercy
begging for pain
wanting the climax now
wanting the climax to never come
thrashing in the mess
carnal knowledge. an intimate carnal knowledge that you could never want to begin to feel with another. the feeling that only he will do, and that no other can approach. fantasizing about another just feels empty and cold. being with another feels like death.

only four more months

2007-02-20T10:42:00.000-06:00

mud and salt on shoes
snow melts at windy daybreak
when come the blossoms?

impersonal personal post no. 2

2007-02-06T14:31:00.000-06:00

today's sapped string of words, brought to you by thesaurus.com:

beat, bleary, bone-weary, bushed, crippled, crispy, dead, dead tired, debilitated, disabled, dog-tired, done for, done in, drained, effete, enervated, frazzled, had it, limp, outta gas, played out, prostrated, run-down, sapped, shot, spent, tired out, wasted, weak, weakened, wearied, worn, worn out

life often requires a lot of energy. . .

random (stream of consciousness) lists

2007-01-26T10:10:00.000-06:00

mala educacion, third man, harold & maude, halloween, requiem for a dream, notes on a scandal, amores perros, talented mr ripley, mysterious skin, welcome to the dollhouse, king of the hill, clerks, ordinary people, ice storm, brokeback mountain, the wedding banquet, hero, the graduate, who's afraid of virginia woolf, rear window, m. . .

peer gynt suite, grieg piano concerto a minor, pictures at an exhibition, beethoven piano concerto no. 3 c minor, night on bald mountain, bartok string quartets, ravel string quartet in F, martin mass for double choir, bach b minor mass, purcell lamentations of jeremiah, shostakovich symphony no. 4, khachaturian tone poems, barber adagio for strings, respighi pines of rome, hayden die sieben letzten worte. . .

melissa hoover, rebekah fowler, rob huether, dean barr, ben rasmussen, liv loge, brent dummit, joel krier, karen miller, carlos smith, carlos cruz, dan ness, deepa nayini, scott king, jacobe caditz. . .

rock 'n' roll in arizona

2007-01-16T16:39:00.000-06:00

best marathon of three! time = 3:41:46 (8:28 pace).

frozen marathon!

2007-01-12T15:54:00.000-06:00

i'm about to do a marathon in "frozen" weather this sunday. while this may not seem out of the ordinary for january in chicago, this cold run will take place in phoenix, az! that's right, i'm arriving there tomorrow (saturday) just in time to enjoy a rather uncharacteristic bout of chicago-like weather. race day - sunday - will have a low of around 30 degrees and a high of around 50! not terrible for a marathon, but i was looking forward to the first long run without my winter running hat in about 3 months!

oh well, i guess at least i'll be used to the cold. . .

old thought

2007-01-10T22:15:00.000-06:00

i know that everyone and his slow brother has probably already seen that genious flick, Mysterious Skin, but i just thought of it again today, and couldn't stop. as an adolescent and teen struggling with many issues, i used to take comfort (if you could call it that) in Gregg Araki's films such as The Living End and The Doom Generation. however, i'm quite certain that Mysterious Skin not only blows those movies away in nearly every aspect, but it manages to do the same to every other movie of 2005, period. when nary a mention was made of the genius that was that movie in neither the oscars or the independent film awards of that year, i think baby jesus must have cried.

if you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor and rent it. just make sure you aren't alone and near a full bottle of downers or a noose at the time.

a new year

2007-01-07T09:05:00.000-06:00

so i'm not quite as savvy as many other bloggers, but it was evident to me that i needed a new slate this year, and what better look than to use a pic from little sayulita, the mexican village where we spent new year's 2006-2007. it calms me just to think of the view and the salty-sweet air.

"Time" for a few facts??

2006-12-22T09:50:00.001-06:00

Time magazine recently published an opinion piece by our BFF James Dobson, decrying the shame of poor Mary Cheney's child-to-be, entitled, "Two Mommies is One Too Many." (i don't feel like linking there and giving Mr. Dobson and Times' online advertisers even more due.)

needless to say, the serpent-tongued spin-doctor's article reeked of false facts and inaccuracies regarding the abilities of same-sex couples to raise a healthy child, in bold contravention to the actual truths of decades of studies on this same topic.

even if you refuse to read the article, i beg you like-minded peeps to sign this petition by "Soulforce" to Times Magazine to publish a counter-article accurately describing the facts behind Mr. Dobson's bigoted, wilfully ignorant and un-scientific views.

brrr!

2006-12-11T09:49:00.000-06:00

i guess that the initial excitement of doing a january marathon in phoenix was enough to blind me to the fact that i'd eventually be doing 20 mile runs in terrible weather here in chicago.

but that's exactly what happened on saturday. although it was supposed to miraculously reach into the lower 40's, it never really got much above 25 while i ran, not to mention that stiff west-southwesterly wind keeping me cursing the entire time. no wonder i had the urge to cut off both legs after i finished.

oh well, i guess that there's only one more long run until taper!

the littlest Cheney

2006-12-06T16:36:00.001-06:00

gotta love the irony. . . (from Salon.com, Page Rockwell):

Littlest Cheney will have two mommies

Hey, Mary Cheney's pregnant! ABC News (along with other media outlets) reports today that Cheney and her longtime partner, Heather Poe, are expecting a baby in the spring. It's hard to know how to treat the news. Sure, it's nice that the couple is expecting, and it's fun to think that their nontraditional family will be rolling up to future White House Christmas parties. Vice President and Mrs. Cheney are reportedly "looking forward with eager anticipation to the arrival of their sixth grandchild," which is also swell. As the daughter of the Bush administration's neoconservative vice president and an out lesbian, though, Mary Cheney has long been a lightning rod for arguments concerning gays, lesbians and the Christian right wing. And as always, it's tough to reconcile the Cheneys' private pride with their public support of a political platform that seeks to deny rights to gays.

Çalışmak zordur.

2006-11-10T11:07:00.000-06:00

off and on now for about three years, i've been trying to teach myself the tongue of my father('s)land: Türkiye.

i must say, that either i'm a bad student or a terrible teacher. while i can say (sort of) and understand (maybe) things like "Kedi uyuyor" or "Bu bir adam insan, hayvan değil," i have trouble with important things like "hi, i'm a liberal westerner, where's the nearest oil wrestling tournament?" or "how may i best insult your culture with my boorish american ignorance?"

sigh. someday, perhaps, i'll feel confident enough with my language skills to attempt to return to Istanbul and find some of my aunts and uncles and cousins.

until then: "güle güle, ülkeyim."

irrational perceptions

2006-10-31T11:22:00.000-06:00

from a story getting only a bit of local press today (from the Chicago Tribune):

"An Oakbrook Terrace man was in custody Monday on charges he planted a bomb that detonated in a Salt Lake City library in September, officials said. Thomas James Zajac, of the 0-100W700 block of Butterfield Road, is charged with possession of an unregistered explosive device, said Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives Special Agent Thomas Ahern."

disturbing story, and an undoubtedly disturbed man. . . but imagine, if you will, the type of mass hysteria and seemingly unending national coverage this story would have been given had the man been named Abu al Hariri or Salem Nassim instead of Thomas Zajac.

i guess Bush's cutting back Clinton's funding of local police forces wasn't such a great idea after all.

and all guys with american flag pins look the same to me

2006-09-29T08:58:00.000-05:00

this "quote of the day" bears repeating from america blog:

On the sectarian violence in Iraq, Sen. Trent Lott said on Thursday:

“Why do they hate each other? Why do Sunnis kill Shiites? How do they tell the difference? They all look the same to me.”

god save america.

i've always wanted stephen colbert in my corner

2006-09-22T15:32:00.000-05:00

i love the 'ON NOTICE' board!

get your own.

after this, no more scars, i promise (?)

2006-09-16T16:23:00.000-05:00

there it sits on my left shoulder, bulging, seemingly breathing, pulsating, even talking on its own -- my very own keloid scar. this particular and rather noticeable addition to my body arrived in spectacular fashion, in a spectacular place, on a spectacular day.

there we were, several of us, mostly friends of nochd's Michael, racing the 2004 ralph's 1/2 ironman in oceanside, ca. i was having an okay day, after an extremely cold swim in the pacific ocean. (i was one of the only morons using a sleeveless wetsuit.) i was on the bike, and had just passed the extremely difficult climb and survived the extremely dangerous downhill descent. i was nearly at mile 49 of the 56-mile bike leg.

and then, i don't really know what happened: i blanked, or my tire got caught in a rut in the pavement, or a strong gust of wind pushed me to one side. but, as i was going fast, and in my aero bars, my reaction to the wiggle was too slow, and there i was on the ground, covered in dust and blood, and half in what appeared to be a rhinoceros-sized yucca plant. was my bike okay?? it seemed to be. . . was i okay? well, i had a huge gash on my left shoulder, another couple of huge gashes on my right hand, another huge gash on my left hip, right knee, and an awful case of roadrash on my entire left leg. so, hell yeah, i was ready to finish the race, no problems.

(now, you have to understand something about me. although as a rule i tend to overthink every step of my life, when i'm racing or training, my mind becomes the equivalent of a hamster running on a squeaky wheel: i have a goal, and i may never get there, but damned if i won't keep going until i can't anymore. this contrast with my usual way of doing things usually keeps me pretty balanced, overall.

to top off the control over my brain that the hamster wheel had exerted, i was also going through what you might call a pre-mid life crisis. the end of my first year as a lawyer was approaching, and i needed to prove to myself that i wouldn't ever let myself be overwhelmed and nearly killed by my profession, as my dad had lived his life. so yeah, at the point of the fall i was a bit crazy. but determined nonetheless.)

i only had 6-7 miles to go, right? that is, until the 13.1 miles running. . . and that would go just fine, right?

so, i hopped back on the bike, after straightening out the handle bars, and continued on -- dripping blood the whole time. needless to say, it was painful. i stayed on the bike for a whole mile before hitting a large bump in the road that flattened both tires at once.

now, i don't know if any of you have ever changed bike tires in a race, or if you've ever changed those tires with half the skin on your dominant hand missing. but, let me tell you, when the adrenaline is pumping, you feel little pain. so, i changed those two tubes, and hopped back on. now, only 5-6 miles left! so, i go literally 100 yards or so, and proceed to get another flat.

at that point, i had no remaining spare tubes. i was forced to stop. quite a lesson. it turns out that my skin wasn't the only damage i sustained that day: i had two cracked ribs and some torn muscle in my abdomen/rib cage. but, who can feel any of that with all that blood all over their hands? if i had tried to run that day, it would have most likely exacerbated my injuries.

as it was, i could do nearly nothing for almost 3 months waiting for all that to heal. by that point, there was really no point in continuing the triathlon season.

i guess, if anything, i learned that day that even four months of careful, exhausting and exhaustive preparations cannot prepare you fully for life. we're all so lucky just to be alive, with all that can go wrong everywhere. so, i guess, when i look at the monster that now lives on my shoulder, i should recognize it as the face of death, ever-present, taunting me, daring me to be alive.

a run a climb a (new) bike and some sushi

2006-08-25T09:18:00.000-05:00

last night was one of those nights when you do more than you think possible. started out by shedding my suit at the office for some running shorts and my camel back to meet up with my "adventure" racing team. we then ran about 8 miles to one of those tall condo buildings on the north shore and proceeded to quickly climb 40 stories. then a quick view from the roof, then a quick dip in the pool. . .

at that point, i had to drag myself back down to bucktown to pick up my (new to me) tri-bike. my previous racing bike having been stolen in broad daylight from outside my gym, i needed a replacement. so i'm now the proud owner of a 2004 quintana roo "ti-phoon" that was previously built for none other than Michael Lovato. (now i'm sure to place in every race i do. . . ) let's hear it for craigslist!

then i shlepped back up to the hood for some wine and sushi at wakamono, a cool little sushi spot from the people that brought us "ping-pong."

all in all, much more fun than i'm used to these days on a school night. i'll have to enjoy these "free" nights while i can before the kid arrives!

almost as cool as GPS!

2006-07-18T16:35:00.000-05:00

now that the "gaymes" triathlon has kicked by (seemingly) too large butt, i'm more motivated than ever to do well at this year's chicago tri. . .

and i've just discovered this site that allows me to trace my runs onto a google map and get an exact distance reading!! too cool.

low oxygen content

2006-07-15T08:32:00.000-05:00

it seems that the worst heat wave in a decade has decided to descend upon greater Chicago just in time for gay games vii. bringing with it a hundred percent humidity and near hundred degree temperatures. . . you gotta love the midwest.

sunday morning will be spent by many, including myself, trying to replace gallons of lost water while at the same time slogging through the watery air during the triathlon. should be a blast. a part of the motto for these games is "personal best."

we'll see.

collateral damage

2006-06-26T09:58:00.000-05:00

in March of 2003, secretary of defense Donald Rumsfeld said during an interview with George Stephanopolous on ABC's This Week, said about the Iraq invasion:

"So it's not just that we win, it's also how we win. And if you think about it, the Iraqi people are in large measure hostages to that vicious regime. And we can do this, and we can do it, I hope and pray, with limited loss of innocent lives."

the los angeles times reported yesterday, however, that at the lowest possible estimate, 50,000 Iraqi citizens have lost their lives since the U.S. led invasion in March 2003. this number is almost certainly too low because of provinces like Al Anbar and the Kurdish territories that have reported or recorded no such data to Baghdad officials.

and, as the article also points out, 50,000 people in a country of only 29 million would here mean proportionally about 570,000 U.S. citizens, or a 9/11 disaster every 5 or 6 days since March 2003.

!!

the long way

2006-06-23T16:37:00.000-05:00

i'm sure i'm not the first to praise my soul-group the Dixie Chicks' new album, but what a great first verse to an album:

"My friends from high school

Married their high school boyfriends

Moved into houses in the same ZIP codes

Where their parents live.

But I, I could never follow

No I, I could never follow. . ."

i urge everyone who likes the Dixie Chicks at all to purchase a copy of the album: you won't be disappointed.

49!

2006-06-07T10:33:00.000-05:00

what the. . . ? forty-nine, (count 'em), forty-nine U.S. senators voted in favor of adding discrimination to our Constitution this morning.

of course, this is well below the two-thirds threshhold for actually amending the Constitution, but really. . . 49?! do nearly half the states actually think that gays marrying will somehow harm straight people's marriages??

more importantly, do nearly half the states actually think that putting the tom-boys and nancy-boys in their place will somehow manage to lower the divorce rate, the single parent rate, the poverty rate, the low test scores. . . ?

do nearly half the states actually think that the big gay problem is actually bigger than our montruous debt, our negative personal savings, our unwinnable and unaffordable war in Iraq, our administration that cloaks itself continually in the tragedy of 911 to get whatever it wants no questions asked Constitution-be-damned, our diminished and diminishing national status as a moral bulwark in the world, our millions upon millions of uninsured individuals, our crumbling infastructures, our rising water levels, our corrupt politicians and business leaders?

i do think the answer is NO. i truly believe that the American people are smarter than that.

i think that those pandering, smarmy senators and back-room pollsters will have a shock come November when we the people will remember them as playing that big gay fiddle while Rome was burning.

so slide over here

2006-06-02T08:35:00.000-05:00

maybe it's because i was completely dead at spin class this morning, but when that old INXS song came on in the middle of a tortuous "hill," i was transported back nearly 20 (!) years to seventh grade.

"your moves are so raw"

in 1986-87, i spent approximately three straight months locked in my room, (ahem), "studying," and listening to two cassette tapes (remember those?): "kick" and "faith." to this day, no other albums seem so fundamentally and inherently "sexy."

". . . what do you think? can't take it all. . ."

perhaps i'm just confusing going through the onslaught of puberty with being really affected by some decent pop music. but really, what's the difference anyway? i suppose we all have those types of mental associations that can transform a multi-million dollar album into a type of ultra-personal anthem. we all, at one time or another, have a strong belief that Michael Hutchence (or his equivalent if one exists) knows every corner of our inner soul, unlike our stupid, uncool parents.

"everybody does, yeah that's okay"

remind me never to be twelve years old again.

to repeat and repeat. . .

2006-05-03T14:23:00.000-05:00

is sometimes necessary.

if you spend any time on the Internet(s) at all, you've probably seen Stephen Colbert's closing remarks at the White House Press Corps annual dinner on April 29th. however, since the media at large is not reporting on this work of genius, i feel it necessary to increase its viewership, by however little. with Swiftian genius, (and only a few feet away from W), Mr. Colbert skewers the Man Who Would Be King with unequalled skill. this speech should live forever as the ultimate example of political satire. do yourself a favor and watch:

COLBERT SKEWERS BUSH AND THE PRESS

please also visit this site, which has great comments from people around the country and the world:

THANK YOU STEPHEN COLBERT

and, after you've watched the clip, pass it along to as many people as you can. . .

more scars

2006-04-25T19:36:00.000-05:00

i was probably five or six when i found myself dangling from that rusty chain-link fence. in retrospect, i don't remember much about my fascination with climbing all the fences in the neighborhood, and with all the dogs and yards they enclosed. but for a summer or two, it became somewhat of an obsession. as soon as i realized that i could climb those fences, my horizons expanded almost infinitely in my mind.

but freedom comes with its costs, and these fences would not yield to me without attempting to take their pound of flesh. it is safe to say that karma was not on my mind as i hung there for those few surprising seconds, all my weight dangling from the part of my mid fore-arm that had caught on a barb at the top of a neighbor's fence.

what i remember most was the blood after i released myself. it spurted along with the rhythm of my quick heart. i was immediately sure that i had killed myself. but, the fountains of blood actually fascinated me, didn't cause me to panic or be sick. and, in a very immature and naive little boy way, i was proud of myself, as if to say: "bring 'em on" or "is that all?".

even though i was ordered never to climb that rusty fence again, i knew that i would. . .

know yourself first. . .

2006-03-31T15:00:00.000-06:00

. . . change the world second.

sounds easy enough. i discovered this almost cliche saying while gazing through the dusk from the "L" train a few evenings ago. it was printed big as life on a billboard in maroon lettering, advertising the local Jesuit stronghold of subversive and dangerous free thought and intellectuality, Loyola University. (where would we be without those Jesuits?)

"know yourself first, change the world second."

these words struck me as very close to my heart. one of my strongest characteristics in the whole myers-briggs schema is the "I" in INTP. i have always been obsessed with concentrating on why i do things and how i do them and how i fit into different complex social and historical contexts, and why, (if at all), any of it matters.

some would call this egotism: i call it enlightenment (or at least aiming for it). i have always viewed with skepticism those people who seem to be so self-sure, who seem never to have needed to question their own existence, who have never had to justify themselves to anyone. i feel (as apparently do the marketing people at Loyola) that the world would indeed be a much better place if everyone would at least attempt that first step, self-knowledge.

all this introspection in my life, and i still have been having an incredibly difficult go of writing my 2000-word autobiography. this autobiography is a prerequisite for adopting a child through the agency we have been using. we each have to write one. how do you describe your entire life in 2000 words? how do you communicate who you are in essay form?

the more i have worked on this infernal project, the longer it gets, and the less it seems to convey who i am, or what i have done with my life.

maybe i should concentrate on changing the world first, you know, for a break. . .

d minus

2006-03-21T19:59:00.000-06:00

i was recently graded on my upkeep of this blog, and no one could disagree with the results. . . my life has had a way of interfering with my updates. with nothing but success in mind, therefore, i promise my loyal reader that i'll try to better myself, even if it means resorting to blogging about naked venezuelans or banned cheers or even posting free randy blue pics.

scars part one

2006-01-06T08:41:00.000-06:00

having quite a bit of semitic blood coursing through my veins, i tend to scar easily. i have scars dating back almost as far as my feeble memory. and i have scars that actually fuel my memory and my conscience, like unintentional tatoos. i have all range of scars, from red to pink to white to shiny to dull to raised to flat.

while my scars always tend to impress the ages 6-10 male audience, i think that most people are put-off by them. i get those looks. you know, the looks that will wander from your eyes during a conversation and then dart to a scar, languishing there just a bit too long, then jolting back up to meet your eyes again, innocently, as if to say: "no, it's okay, i think you're a perfectly normal human being. . . now i gotta go do something else."

one of my most noticeable scars (for the general public) is just over eleven years old. it is also the most man-made looking scar i have, as it is the result of surgery. i earned it when i was nineteen, just before my second year of college.

it began on one of those warm august nights in the st. louis suburbs, charged with the energy and sadness of momentarily-reunited high-school friends, now more strangers than anything else, fending-off boredom and the recognition that many of us didn't know who we were anymore, let alone who anyone else was. (ah, to be nineteen again!)

due to college expense situations, my old tank of a car had just been sold, and i was borrowing my younger sister's convertible for the remaining few weeks of the summer. many of the old gang had met at MMcMs house. not knowing what to do with ourselves, we decided to caravan to the regional favorite personal-fast-fat-storage-retailers to indulge in some frozen custard.

in my sister's car were myself, one of my best friends J, and another good friend D. (the convertible had a back seat, although not much of one.) one thing led to another, and several minutes later we were all three trapped under a smoking, upside-down convertible. correction: by the time i knew what was happening, only i was trapped, my left hand pinned between the earth and the car.

i did the only reasonable thing that i could do -- i pulled that sucker out fast, consequences be damned, and ran.

i remember long hours in excrutiating pain sitting in the ER, staring at the jumbled equipment bolted to the solid walls, and fearing the lack of privacy left by the retractable curtain walls. but what i most remember is the fear of my father mixed together with the excrutiating pain in my left hand.

more than the thoughts of having a crippled hand the rest of my life, i feared that my father would be mad, that he would be apoplectic, that his head would inflate to twice its normal size and burst, that he would be disappointed.

my fears were founded. upon returning to the house at approximately 3:00 the next morning, my father loudly proclaimed that i had ruined the family, left the house, and didn't come back for several days. he told no one where he was going or when he would be back. he never asked how i was or how my friends were. he didn't thank my mom for sitting patiently with me for all that time while he remained at home. nothing at all but proclaiming the ruination of the family and the disappearing act. (all that, and he didn't even know i was gay yet!)

yep. every time i look at that scar on the left hand, i see that nexus of age, innocence, ego and self-loathing that embody those few days of my nineteenth year. how just a few moments can change you forever. . . how powerful a small shift in perception can be. . .

the next constitutional amendment?

2005-12-22T11:16:00.000-06:00

the gospel of Matthew, chapter 19 verse 24, quotes Jesus as saying, in an incredibly direct manner:

"And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God." (King James Version)

very few of Jesus' edicts are as plainly spoken as that. why, then, isn't being rich illegal in our country? are we careening down a path toward pure evil? Jesus never issued any such straightforward edicts against practicing gay sex, for example. i propose that in order to fully accept the true spirit of the gospels, and to return our morals to god's and nature's true way, we must concentrate on getting this amendment into every state constitution, as well as the federal one.

once we try to embrace Jesus’ true spirit in our constitutions by making it illegal to have material possessions, only then should we turn our attentions to the issues of the obvious evils of shared human love and compassion.

wishlist

2005-12-21T16:29:00.000-06:00

(not to be confused with that great song from Yield)

as i watch my dreams of an x-mas in sunny (or at least summery) BsAs slowly fade into a dark, gray blustery Chicago reality, i can't help but think of all the places i'd like to go. (and i somehow remember a greenish purplish orangish monster thingy promising me a future filled with diverse locales in poetry with fake words that rhyme with other fake words.)

so, in the spirit of that "poetry," here is a current expression of places i wish i were, (or will soon be, real or imagined):

be it Paris or London or ancient Rome,
the Sahara or Gobi or the Kara Kum,
i'd like to go there, i don't really care where;

by the Yangtze or Nile or piranha-filled Amazon,
i can't think of the soil that my feet fear to tread-upon,
i'd like to go there, i don't really care where:

India, Pakistan, Armenia, Georgia,
Uzbekistan, Khazhakstan, Turkmenistan, Torja,
Peru and Nepal, Liechtenstein,and Latvia,
Scotland and Whales and Ireland and Hot-n-totvia.

no continent, kingdom or city or hill,
can escape my desires or my travelling will,
i'd like to go there, i don't really care where.

up a snow white mountain into cavern deep as night,
if i only think hard enough i can muster my might;

through rivers and oceans and brooks in a fen,
i'll go there and love it, just tell me where and when.

yes, i'd like to go there, i don't really care where.

poor gay James Buchanan

2005-12-08T10:59:00.000-06:00

. . .just read an article by Richard Reeves that summarized a poll taken of American Historians about where Bush II would rank among our presidents. Previously, the rumored-to-be-gay and only bachelor president ever, James Buchanan, had been ranked as our worst, because of things like his unintentional contributions to the start of the Civil War, for instance.

but, it seems, the historians feel that Bush II may surpass Mr. Buchanan in this dubious distinction, and be remembered as our worst president yet. (at least Buchanan had only one term.)

the highlights:

"This is what those historians said -- and it should be noted that some of the criticism about deficit spending and misuse of the military came from self-identified conservatives -- about the Bush record:

He has taken the country into an unwinnable war and alienated friend and foe alike in the process;

He is bankrupting the country with a combination of aggressive military spending and reduced taxation of the rich;

He has deliberately and dangerously attacked separation of church and state;

He has repeatedly "misled," to use a kind word, the American people on affairs domestic and foreign;

He has proved to be incompetent in affairs domestic (New Orleans) and foreign (Iraq and the battle against al-Qaida);

He has sacrificed American employment (including the toleration of pension and benefit elimination) to increase overall productivity;

He is ignorantly hostile to science and technological progress;

He has tolerated or ignored one of the republic's oldest problems, corporate cheating in supplying the military in wartime."

At least now there's hope that it won't be the poor gay president that gets the worst rap. . .

faded and grainy but still smiling

2005-12-05T15:04:00.000-06:00

the older i get, the more this is true.

i do have so much to smile about: a good family (both chosen and given), a good job, a good bill of health, a warm place to stay.

sometimes, though, i'm blinded by the light of life, barely able to see the importance of anything. it's tough to filter it out, but i'll keep working at it.

now, back to work.

sigh

2005-11-22T16:26:00.000-06:00

frozen yellow bud
doomed by the cruel fall winds
never had a chance

then and now

2005-11-09T08:20:00.000-06:00

maybe it has to do with the recent releases of Sid & Marty Krofft's H.R. Pufnstuf DVD's, but i've had that infamous Barbara Mandrell song stuck in my head for days now. you know, "sleepin' single in a double bed, oooh - oooh."

'tho' the connection be thin, the Krofft brothers also produced another one of my favorite shows as a child: the Mandrell sisters variety show. these three sisters danced, they played many musical instruments, they wore sparkly clothes, they sang, they did skits, they wore sparkly clothes, and a whole bunch of other sparkly things. enough to make any red-blooded American kid sit up and pay attention for hours upon sparkly hours. (well it seemed red-blooded and American enough to a somewhat "shy" boy of 6 at the time, anyway. . .)

then it hit me: my current unhealthy and uncharacteristic obsession with the Dixie Chicks has a strong country-glam root, pounded into me chord after sparkly chord by those early 80s sisters.
i never had a chance.

but, at least there's been some improvement in 25 years or so, right?

the devil you know. . .

2005-10-27T10:32:00.000-05:00

it seems that a strange coalition of democrats with spines and right-wing nutjobs have forced Ms. Meirs out of a Supreme Court position. the inevitable question: what awaits us in her wake?

the sound of silence

2005-10-05T12:09:00.000-05:00

i agree with Tim Grieve on the impending silence from Ms. Miers in her Senate Hearings. why does this woman scare me so very much?

"Senators won't be able to ask Miers questions based on her prior judicial decisions or her scholarly writings on the constitution because no such things exist. They won't be able to ask her questions based on the written advice she has given the president because he won't turn over such documents. They can ask Miers about discussions she's had with the president, but she'll almost certainly invoke either executive privilege or the attorney-client privilege. They can ask about her views on issues that matter to a lot of Americans -- abortion, gay rights, the war on terrorism -- but she'll almost certainly refuse to answer on the ground that such issues might come before the court. And they can ask about the role her religious faith may play in the judicial decision she might make, but some of their colleagues may shout them down -- as they have before -- with charges of religious bias."

(from October 5, 2005 "War Room" post at Salon.com, Tim Grieve.)

2005-09-26T09:19:00.000-05:00

now the world can see why i'm so fabulous. it's always strange to see your parents when they were so young and in love.

the hand

2005-09-23T09:58:00.000-05:00

My usual route from the gym to the office in the morning includes passing by union station, navigating around and through the suburban throngs pouring into my dear city. This route has its share of entertainment, though. From white-sneakered ladies with 2-hour coifs and navy skirt-suits and i-can't-see-or-hear-you headphones to the homeless beggars to the Peruvian pan-flute bands hocking their CDs on the sidewalk, my walk gives me the zen, urban, so-noisy-it's-quiet, constitutional my mind craves every day before yet again remembering my career and all that goes with it.

almost without exception, this daily route will also include some form of handout, flyer, or "freebie" foisted on me and my fellow walkers by the hired-hands of corporate america. from yogurt in a tube (remember that?) to m&m "amazing" candies to the big gorilla man handing out gym fliers to ads for the new "i-dog" to 5x8 glossies of an enhanced photo of an 8-week old fetus, looking at me with all the wisdom of Yoda and all the sadness of Eeyore, saying to me: "why do you want to kill me. . . ?" everyone's trying to sell me something, and that process makes me feel like, yes, this IS america, and yes, even I can make a difference, however small, by buying into someone else's dream of the world. (as long as i have space left on my card or in my conscience.)

BUT, the other day i was confronted my a man in an orange jumper who shoved the following words in my face: "ARE YOU ALERT?" double-take, look at the flyer again. WHAT? what's he trying to sell? what does he want from me? then 5 questions meant as an "alertness" quiz: do you often feel fatigued? are you sometimes too tired to enjoy going out with friends? do you have trouble paying attention or staying focused? etc. etc.

of course i answered YES to all the questions, but does that mean i'm not "alert"? and if so, then what? so a quick trip to their website: "http://www.alertnessmatters.com/" after taking the online quiz, i realized that i was being tricked into submitting personal contact info for some sort of cruise-package giveaway. they just wanted my e-mail and phone number for FSM-knows what reason. NO THANKS -- i'll deal with my tired, lazy old self without your help.

however, my faith in the american system of high-pressure, devious sales and marketing had been restored. i have been shaken out of my unalert state by the bitch-slapping invisible hand of Adam Smith. *whew*

the truth is out there?

2005-09-14T08:33:00.000-05:00

it's amazing how a TRUTH so obvious could've gone hidden from me for so long. . . it seems that there is a reason that my bio-chem carreer in undergrad was doomed from the start: the SCIENCE was all based on LIES.

a man named Bobby Henderson has enlightened me to HIS EVERSAUCY HOLINESS: The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

i now know that FSM has created all things in his ever-loving kindness, and that all so-called study of biology, physics, chemistry, and math is a sham. i know now that in order not to incur His vengeful wrath, we must not rest until His TRUE SCIENCE of the universe is taught in all our schools. Bobby the Prophet has said it best:

"Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him."

now that i have seen the TRUTH, my life will never be the same, and i cannot stop riding the scent of his garlicky goodness to eternal SALVATION.

you can also become enlightened at: Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

and remember: don't rest until we reach the time "when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence."

let's hear it for the second amendment

2005-09-01T08:27:00.000-05:00

item 1: walmart in new orleans area looted: all guns and ammo reported stolen. . .

item 2: from A.P. this morning

Superdome Evacuation Halted Amid Gunfire

The evacuation of the Superdome was suspended Thursday after shots were reported fired at a military helicopter and arson fires broke out outside the arena. No immediate injuries were reported.

The scene at the Superdome became increasingly chaotic, with thousands of people rushing from nearby hotels and other buildings, hoping to climb onto the buses taking evacuees from the arena, officials said. Paramedics became increasingly alarmed by the sight of people with guns.
Richard Zeuschlag, chief of the ambulance service that was handling the evacuation of sick and injured people from the Superdome, said it was suspending operations "until they gain control of the Superdome."

He said shots were fired at a military helicopter over the Superdome before daybreak.

He said the National Guard told him that it was sending 100 military police officers to restore order.

"That's not enough," Zeuschlag said. "We need a thousand."

Lt. Col. Pete Schneider of the Louisiana National Guard said the military — which was handling the evacuation of the able-bodied from the Superdome — had suspended operations, too, because fires set outside the arena were preventing buses from getting close enough to pick up people.

He said tens thousands of people started rushing out of other buildings when they saw buses pulling up and hoped to get on. But the immediate focus was on evacuating people from the Superdome, and the other refugees were left to mill around.

Zeuschlag said paramedics were calling him and crying for help because they were so scared of people with guns at the Superdome. He also said that during the night, when a medical evacuation helicopter tried to land at a hospital in the outlying town of Kenner, the pilot reported 100 people were on the landing pad, some with guns.

"He was frightened and would not land," Zeuschlag.

yet another chicago triathlon.

2005-08-29T15:38:00.000-05:00

. . . getting marginally better:

Start of Swim:
00:00:00
End of Swim:
00:27:04

Total Swim:
00:27:04

Transition:
00:02:34

Start of Bike:
00:29:38
End of Bike:
01:37:35

Total Bike:
01:07:57

Transition:
00:02:46

Start of Run:
01:40:21
End of Run:
02:29:34

Total Run:
00:49:13

Total Time:
02:29:34

if you pray hard enough, you'll get an A in science

2005-08-25T08:01:00.000-05:00

http://www.markfiore.com/animation/super.html

2005-08-23T12:03:00.000-05:00

it's good to know that i haven't changed in 23 years.

media and adoption?

2005-08-19T09:12:00.000-05:00

part of the application: "what adoption images from the media (news/books/television) contribute to your views on adoption, and how" (or something to that effect). minds go blank, powers of deduction are crippled. here are the first thoughts:

(1) annie (of course my first thought)
(2) diff'rent strokes (child of the eighties)
(3) jungle book (okay, i'm not sure if being adopted by a pack of wolves counts, but. . .)
(4) augustus ceasar and octavius (had to be a little bit UofC)

and i can't seem to think of more. . . it seems i'm only remembering stories where the adoptee is better off with the adopted parents. where the child obtains wealth, prowess, and power upon being adopted.

while i'm not sure we'll be able to offer any of these qualities, i'd like to think we'll be able to offer: food, care, thought, love, self-esteem, a biting sense of sarcasm, and a healthy distrust of authority.

back to reality, oops there goes gravity. . .

2005-08-10T09:50:00.000-05:00

not that gravity works any different here in the northern hemisphere, but i am feeling it a bit more now that i'm back from beautiful BsAs. the reasons are many: (1) work load hits like an out-of-control locomotive bent on destruction of the very concept of peace; (2) 10 days of constant intake of extreme amounts of food and wine, coupled with decreased triathlon training, have literally made me more susceptible to the effects of the earth's gravitational pull; (3) 95 muggy and polluted degrees fahrenheit seem to weigh one down more than the crisp 10s (celsius) of a BsAs winter; (4) just having finished "oryx and crake" (m. atwood) on the plane ride home leaves me feeling extremely depressed about the future of humanity. . .

all in all, a slow, wet, hot, sad, dirty, heavy, and somehow still manic return to the quotidian.

death and taxis

2005-07-30T16:35:00.000-05:00

after a death-defying trip to Recoleta, in a cab driven by a man who was obviously used to cheating death on a daily basis, a never-ending march through the narrow passages of the rather creepy necropolis. when i´m dead, i want a masoleum that is bigger than any house i ever had in life. it´s the after-life that seems to be important here in B.A. . . . live like death is just around the corner, and die like you´re a god. it´s what Evita would´ve wanted.

the southern hemisphere

2005-07-29T15:33:00.000-05:00

first day here in argentina. . . B.A. is a real town, with an awesome atmoshpere. it feels strange to travel so far with no jet lag. i couldn´t have made it, though, without the wonder that is ambian. sleep on a plane has never been so easy.

god bless the CIA?

2005-07-26T15:35:00.000-05:00

Testimony of James Marcinkowsky (a "former CIA case officer") from last week, which begins:

"I've wasted too many hours of my life going on talking head shoutfests with conservatives who pooh-pooh the Plame/CIA leak matter (now known as the Rove scandal), who claim there was little damage done, who say that Valerie Wilson was only a desk jockey and dismiss her undercover status as "light" or "flimsy," who argue that no crime was broken and no wrongdoing occurred, and who are lightning quick to depict the controversy as nothing but a game of politics. These folks are spinning to save Rove and to protect the White House, and they distort, disinform, and dissemble for the team."

worth the time for a full read: http://www.thenation.com/blogs/capitalgames?bid=3&pid=7948

call of the wild

2005-07-26T11:26:00.000-05:00

in case you get the urge to eat chicken mcnuggets one evening in a rush, just don't do it. it always seems like a good idea before you eat, but then. . .

an obvious comment on an old song

2005-07-22T15:59:00.000-05:00

they say that having a single tune running through your head constantly is an indication of excessive stress. . . well then, my whole life has been one long stressful episode (albeit with different tunes.) right now, i can't get RUFUS W. out of my head, with his crazy love of 'chocolate milk,' 'jelly beans,' and 'those other things, which for several reasons we won't mention.' he may be a 'little bit irish' and a 'little bit heiress,' but aren't we all?

2005-07-22T08:31:00.000-05:00

morning comes with a cool humid breeze. sunday it will be 100? going to argentina (and winter) after this heat and drought will seem like paradise.

good ol' Sid (Blumenthal)

2005-07-21T17:08:00.000-05:00

"'I was horrified by the president's last speech on the war on terror [on June 28] -- so much unsaid, so much disingenuous, so many half-truths,' James Dobbins told me. Dobbins was Bush's first envoy to Afghanistan and is now director of international programs at the Rand Corp., a defense think tank. Afghanistan is now the scene of a Taliban revival, chronic Pashtun violence, dominance by U.S.-supported warlords (who have become narco-lords, exploiting the exploding traffic in opium poppies), and a human rights black hole. "Afghanistan is going better than Iraq," Dobbins said. 'That's not much of a standard.'"

2005-07-21T16:38:00.000-05:00

together

Constant reminder

2005-07-21T14:32:00.000-05:00

despite all the hubbub over John Roberts, we'd do well to be reminded of a few things: http://www.obleek.com/iraq/index.html

it begins?

2005-07-21T14:02:00.000-05:00

we'll see how this turns out. . . perhaps better than a journal, as i am always at a computer these days. perhaps worse, due to the inevitable chilling of free expression that is an audience of any kind. . .

and so begins the blog of me. (take note, historians.)